H-U-M-I-L-I-T-Y

The last couple of weeks have been a journey in self-definition and humility. Often, it feels like humility is a curse...even saying the word has a bit of sting that can be spelled out like a 4-letter word. There's no other way to say it than to admit that I have pride issues. Oh...YOU TOO?! Good...For a minute there, I thought I was alone. I figured that there were so many times when I would think that I've got it. I'd have a conversation with the Lord and "let him know" (as if He's taking advice from me), that we didn't have to go through these humbling lessons anymore. "I've got it already!" Ha! I suppose that if you have to say anything about it, then you probably don't really have it. So as I've learned, like Paul, to be "abased and abound" (Philippians 4:12) God continues to mold me like clay and purify me like gold. And, while it's not comfortable, I've truly come to a place where I can appreciate parts of this journey. In the role I have right now of housekeeping on a medical mission, I have come to a place where all I hear each day in my head that Jesus came to serve and not be served.

just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.” (Matthew 20:28)

Wow...what a privilege it has become for me to walk out this road of service. I'm not perfect as Christ was. I don't always want to be the one doing the serving, but I have come to such a genuine place of peace in the midst of it all...

I pray today that you too are able to take the sting out of service. As you walk this Christian journey, it is my prayer that you constantly remember that humility is a journey and begin to appreciate the ride.

Blessings,
MinD

Out Of The Boat & Then Back On...Go figure!

This weekend, my life shifted ever the more. Months ago I made a decision to take some time and apply to serve on Mercy Ships. After some time in the application process, I was approved and began the process of raising money and getting my life ready for this drastic shift. Though I'm still raising money, I have gone forward with full force. And so in this journey to be "water walking" out here on the water with Jesus

, I've found myself conveniently back on the boat...literally! 

It's all been very exciting. I arrived here in Pointe Noire, Congo a couple of days ago. I was worn out after 24+ hours of travel, but my heart was overflowing! We arrived under the cloak of darkness so it felt like Christmas morning the next day to get up and hurry to a window so I could see out. I've spent these few days getting acquainted and settling in and being somewhat overwhelmed by the potential of what can be done here.

When I made the decision to make this trip, it was at the prodding of the Holy Spirit yet again to make a move. I find myself in familiar yet unfamiliar territory. I'm sure you're wondering how that's possible. I'd say that I've almost become familiar with the idea that I'm out here on this faith walk and don't know much about what the end result will be. But the unfamiliarity comes in redefining myself. Over the last couple of months, I've had the pleasure to wander around and spend quality time with family and friends before making this trip. Inevitably the question that has continually come my way is "Where are you from?" and "What are you doing?" 

How is it possible that such simple questions could render me completely at a loss. People ask these questions because they help them to categorize you or find points of commonality. However, what happens when you can't articulate simple answers to such simple questions? I've come to that place in my life where I no longer identify with "where I'm from". I've come to say that 'I'm from here and there' or a child of the world. I sound like a hippie but it's how I feel. Perhaps if we were still in the 60's that's exactly what I'd be--a flower child. But in this day and age, it's unacceptable to not be able to say what you do and clearly help people know who you are. 

And so here I sit, on a boat on the dock in the Congo with the feeling that my life is changing with every little type of the keyboard. The shifts keep coming and I'm hanging in there. Perhaps I'll have a better answer soon to those self-defining questions...then again maybe I won't. But there's one thing I can say about this business of being out of this boat above all else: I'm surrounded with that immeasurable peace that surpasses understanding and I wouldn't trade that for the world. 

That's all for now!

Blessings,
MinD/PastorA

P.S. If you are interested in learning more about Mercy Ships or supporting my service (every dollar helps), you can visit my page at http://mercyships-us.donorpages.com/crewmates/AndreaDiallo.

Leaving The Rest Area

It's been a while...

Despite my silence, my adventure hasn't ended. After much prayer and pulling from the Lord, I made a decision to take another step closer to Him off this boat on the water. It has meant leaving friends (who have become family) behind and really stretching my faith in ways that I didn't realize needed to be stretched. And, the truth is...it's lonely out here...

Maybe one day I'll spend some time really exploring THAT, but I just needed to check in and share some good news. As a whole, God has been dealing with me about being even more vulnerable and fully exposed for Him--not allowing fear to have any foothold in my faith walk. With this tugging on my spirit, I had to face the facts: I'd been hiding. The only way I can explain it is that it's like I stepped out on faith, left my home (like Abraham), and then pulled the car over in a rest area. But I've decided that I refuse to get stuck here. My key is in the ignition and I'm pulling out back on the road of my faith. As a step in this direction, I spent some time doing some things that truly make me feel "exposed".

First, I loaded a few sermon clips on YouTube (YIKES!) and then, today, I did something exciting and finally finished converting my book (yes...I wrote a book for those who don't know) to digital availability on Kindle. Yep...I'm feeling extra exposed and started thinking of all the negatives that could come out of this. So I had to get online and take a stand against those thoughts. I'm stopping the chatter in my head and replacing it with the positive. Say it with me:

I'M MOVING IN FAITH!

I'M NOT AFRAID OF FAILURE!

I'M NOT AFRAID OF SUCCESS!

I'M FULLY SURRENDERED TO GOD'S WILL!

IT'S OKAY TO BE SCARED AS LONG AS I KEEP WALKING...

GOD'S GOT MY BACK.

I AM TRIUMPHANT FOR AND THROUGH HIM!

Any questions?

Blessings from the water,
A

New Perspective...

I was thinking of the decision to leave my job the last few days. Well...it's something I think of often and piece my decision apart to ensure that I heard God and made the right move. Though it's difficult for me to understand in the midst of my circumstances, I usually end my thoughts reassured. So when I encounter someone along my path who I tell if this journey, I'm not completely clueless as to why they have a difficult time understanding my choice. And then recently, I got a new perspective on the decision.

If our nation were at war, and I had made a decision to drop everything and fight in that war. Even if there were little to no pay involved, people would not struggle to understand. If that very war was a threat to my life--putting me in harm's way and risking death--people would consider me valiant. Even if my family despised the decision, the support of my nation and comrades would carry me through and reinforce the decision on a daily basis.

And so it is in ministry. I believe that there is a war between what's righteous and evil going on in this world. The Bible tells us we war against "powers and principalities". I believe that people's lives are at stake if we don't do the work to fight for them; and I took drastic measures to join the fight full time. I expect that some friends and family may begrudge the choice I've made, but I'm girded up on every side by comrades in the Kingdom who know the struggle and understand the necessity. I have people I can call when I'm thrown of by a tactical move made by the enemy or when I'm awed by the protection of my God.

I say all of this to say that if you don't have those type of comrades, you are fighting in the wrong unit. If you are floundering out there trying to justify your decision, I encourage you to start simply telling people you are a captain or general in battle for a secret operatives team. That will quiet them. In the end, you must follow after what GOD said and not what man fears.

Be encouraged and stay focused!
MinD

Faithful to Finish

For I am confident of this very thing, 

that He who began a good work in you 

will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus. 

(Philippians 1:6 NASB)

There are times in our lives when we become discouraged. There are days when we look up and around and begin to lose sight of whatever God has said for our lives. There are seasons when the promise of God seems so illusive--where the reality of our circumstance and situation makes seeing the possibilities of God's will difficult. We are weighed down by life and responsibility. We are distracted by the twists and turns of day-to-day living and begin to forget that God is a God who can make it all straight.

I am in such a season. If you're anything like me, you begin to think you must have dreamed it all. I have pouted and thrown tantrums with God. I had even made a decision the other day that perhaps I should simply start trying to convince myself not to believe. In the interest of being content or satisfied, perhaps I should simply decide that I'm not meant to be or do any more than what I'm currently being and doing. I began to think that if I lower my expectations of what God said was to happen, the process would somehow hurt or fatigue me less when/if things didn't move as I would hope. I'm a person who shouts "YOU MUST HAVE FAITH!" from the highest mountain tops, but was facing a crisis of my own--thinking that it was enough to have faith in how powerful I believe God to BE without fully investing my heart in the faith for what He said He would DO!

I went back and forth in my mind the last few days about weather to embrace this shift in mindset. BUT GOD (gotta love when He puts his "but" in things), the lover of my soul, wrapped His arms around me in the form of an emailed video from a friend today. My friend had done me the favor of digitizing the video from my initial sermon. (I have only watched this sermon once and that was some time after at the taunting of friends.) But TODAY, I needed to be reminded and God was faithful to send me that reminder. I remembered that being content and satisfied were not one in the same. As I listened God reminded me that wanting what He has for me has nothing to do with not being content. If He doesn't do another thing for me, I will be content. But I refuse to live satisfied with less than what was His original intent when He fashioned me in my mother's womb. The Bible tells me to press towards the mark (Phil 3:14) and not just float our way there. There is action and intention in walking out the promises of God and we cannot lose sight of the destination while we are panting through the course!

Just has He did for me, it is His intention for you to understand that He IS a Promise Keeper! You were starting to feel like you must have dreamed what God said or like He has forgotten, but He sent me today to remind you in love that He's not a man that He should lie! He sees you and knows your path! HIS WORD IS BOND!!! He's a FINISHER and will begin what He started in you. Beyond your tears and the realities of your circumstance lies your PROMISE. Today, be encouraged to keep your eye on the prize and keep pressing. He's well worth it!

Blessings,
MinD

P.S. I've posted this in my prayer point devotional as well and have uploaded a clip from my initial sermon on YouTube (http://youtu.be/2E6hVj0Hotc). If you have 7 minutes, please take a look and stand in agreement with me for the promises that God is bringing to pass and be encouraged to share that encouragement with those you think may need a bit of a boost today.

Persevering After The Hit

The concept of perseverance is one that is often learned the hard way. We are placed in situations where we're pushed to our limits. However, today, I found encouragement to persevere in the oddest of places. I was reading an article today about an owl. I know that's an odd topic to randomly be reading about, but a tweet on the ABC News twitter feed caught my eye. Apparently, a woman in Florida hit an owl who, in turn, got stuck in the front grill of her vehicle and remained alive throughout the ordeal. "The owl that a Florida tourist hit with her SUV and unwittingly transported for about 100 miles in the grill of her vehicle appears to have survived the ordeal none the worse for the ride..." the article read. And as I tried to move on to the next thought, I couldn't shake the look of this owl peaking out from the front fender of her car:

Photo Credit to ABC News

As I gazed at the picture, the Lord began to minister to me about how there are times in our lives when we take a hit, sometimes get stuck, get taken along for the ride and end up "no worse for the wear". In fact, like this owl, we sometimes make it to our destination a little shaken up but definitely in a new (and perhaps better) environment. Here was an owl who, for all intents and purposes could have FLOWN the 100 miles to where it ended up. But God took it there another way. In essence, it was transported sort of like Jonah in the belly of the great fish--it didn't get there the conventional way but an unorthodox route.

God is taking so many of us by an unorthodox route. He has used a "hit" to get us in position to be carried to that next place in life. And all we can do at the end of the day is praise Him for delivering us safely to the place of HIS plan. Though that owl may not have planned to go that way, God had a greater plan. Though the owl felt "stuck" along the way, God was moving it with purpose and intention. And just when the owl should have been forgotten, someone took notice and brought it out of bondage...out of its sticking place. I just believe that the same God that did this for an owl, would do so much more for us (his favored children). I believe that God allowed so many of us to get hit by life. I believe that many of us are feeling stuck in a holding pattern. But, I believe that, beyond what we can see, God is moving me/us with purpose and intention. We are along for the ride. I believe that just at that moment when we feel we've been forgotten, deliverance will occur. I believe that, just like this owl, we will persevere beyond the hits and our life's experience will tell a testimony for many to see when it's all said and done.

Yeah...that's what I believe.

Be encouraged.

Blessings,
MinD

P.S. You can read the full story of this amazing owl at http://abcnews.go.com/blogs/headlines/2013/02/florida-driver-hits-owl-that-survives-miles-in-suv-grill/

Back In The Game

I read an article recently called "Dating While Smart". It was a well-constructed diatribe about the woes of being a smart woman (particularly African American) in the dating world. She expounded on the pressure to "dumb it down" and the simple lack of men of her "caliber" around to make the dating experience anything less than frustrated.

Much of what she wrote, I could identify with to a certain extent. As an African American woman whose understanding of the world is shaped by my multicultural/multicontinental upbringing and multiple degrees of higher education, I have faced similar expectations and frustrations. Without sounding arrogant, it simply presents it's own set of challenges. Though my personal preferences do not exclude men with educational backgrounds different from mine, I do have a desire to have whoever I am involved with challenge me to be better. And, as I read her words, I found myself thinking of the added challenge (I hate to say) that my faith tends to add to how and who I consider in my dating life.

You see, I'm a firm believer in what the Bible says--we are not to be "unequally" yoked in our relationships (2 Cor 6:14). However, the reality of that is harder to live out for me than I would like to admit. The truth of the matter is that I struggle with that side that wants to simplify life and remove every hurdle that I have imagined exists (though not necessarily real) and just be ME. I'm a Christian and proud of that fact, but dealing with other people's assumptions about what that must mean is not fun.

It seems that everyone has their ideas of who I am before giving me a chance to be me. Ive had several well-intentioned gentlemen tell me that they couldn't pursue anything with me or other Christian women serious about their walk for fear of living in a space of being judged at every turn for their human frailties. And the truth is that I don't want to compromise my Christian standards. I don't want to deal with someone who is completely insensitive to my faith. But here has to be a happy middle ground, because I find myself frustrated by the constant miseducation of the world on Christians.

The unfortunate truth is that it isn't the world's fault that they feel this way. It's our fault as Christians who have approached the world in constant judgement because of legalistic rules that only apply to a few and have little to do with faith. One guy assumed in jest that I may be opposed to wearing high heels...really?? This is what my dating world is like?! Much of it makes me honestly want to strip myself of my faith-based titles and those assumptions at times. But when I even start to lean in that direction, I remember how much God loves me. I remember that, despite my sin, He acknowledges me at every turn. I remember that, God even says that if we deny him before men, he will deny us before the Heavenly Father.

And so, despite my frustrations of being "Saved While Dating", I persevere knowing that the RIGHT one will "find" me and will be able to see me. What I will never do is disavow my faith to accommodate ignorance. I guess I'll have to just chalk it up to being back in the dating game.

It is what it is.Keep walkin'...

MinD

Radical Without Apology (Safe Ministry?!)

Yesterday, I began a service project doing a clean-up in a sketchy area of town all alone. I waited for a moment before beginning. However, it quickly became evident that those who signed up were not necessarily going to show up. I remembered that I had made a commitment to God that was without conditions. I didn't say to Him "I'll serve you if I have company." When I said "Yes" to Him, there was no caveat for "only when I can be assured that my life is not in danger." And so I kept my eyes open, the worship music lightly playing in my headphones and a prayer coming from my lips as I began to fill a bag with the liquor bottles and other trash that were evidence of a community that had begun to lost hope. And I prayed as I went that the power of God would overtake that place and that hope would be restored. And about 1/2 hour in, one of my co-laborers showed up. And about 1/2 hour after her, another pressed her way through sickness to fulfill her own personal promise to God. Not everyone showed up. There were no men in our Three-woman crew. But we watched and prayed as we cleaned and left feeling like we had really done something.

Later that day, I was confronted by the well-meaning words of a friend who, out of love, felt that I should have bailed and called it a day when no one showed up. Their good intentions sparked me to continue an internal debate that I have been having with myself for some time now. It's a debate that has been fueled by the loving suggestions of well-meaning friends and family, my own Type A desire to have things happen "just so", and by news reports that share the reality of the dangerous life of Christians around the world. The question centers around whether or not I should practice "safe" ministry.

In many ways that term "safe" seems at a complete odds with the word "ministry". When I read my Bible, I see story after story of people sticking out their necks for God. The three Hebrew boys in the book of Daniel didn't choose safety when they were faced with the fiery furnace (Daniel 3:19-25). Paul's entire life was one prison experience after another after he began living for Christ. And I've always felt a kinship to Queen Esther whose famous words were "if I perish, I perish!" (Esther 4:16) as she made a decision to do what was right for God. Furthermore, Christ is the ultimate example of one who came ready to sacrifice for what righteousness' sake. When I read The Great Commission in Matthew 28, I see where it says to 'go and make disciples and baptize folks' but I fail to note any follow-up verse that says "Only go to places you can control the safety. If you're a woman, be sure you're accompanied by a man. If you're sick, stay home in bed so you don't wear yourself out. If you're going to be alone, just cancel that trip and reschedule a new one." 

Am I missing something?! Do you see those words in the Bible somewhere? I know that we are told to use wisdom in all that we do. There is no question about that. Wisdom means being clear about being led by God and not by some adventurous/rebellious spirit. Wisdom means constantly praying. Wisdom means using as many resources as are available to you as long as they are not at the expense of doing ministry. However, I think that the Western Christian church has taken that to the extreme and act as though wisdom means protect yourself at all cost. We timidly act as though God is not THE God who is El Shaddai (God all mighty) and Jehovah Nissi (our banner)--able to protect and keep us in all situations according to His will. We have taken that as a license to limit ministry and, consequently, limit the potential to impact the world for God. But, the truth of Christianity is that we are called to die both in the spirit and flesh. We are called to a life of sacrifice and, if we are really trying to emulate CHRIST, then we take that calling to also include the potential to sacrifice our life for what we believe in. So it would seem that, instead of making decisions to cancel mission trips to war-torn, non-evangelized areas, churches around the U.S. should be rallying to focus their efforts on those areas where the hope of Christ is needed the most. Instead of talking about what we can't do, we need to live in the midst of the Truth that says that we can 'do ALL things through Christ who strengthens us' (Philippians 4:13).
  
I weep when I read reports of all of the men, women and children around the globe and throughout history who have been martyred for Christ. Trust me, I am not trying to be one of them. But, I am also not running scared from that possibility. In the Western world we have the luxury of choice when it comes down to it. We choose our level of commitment to God and to His Gospel based on our comfort and convenience: Church on Sundays and Wednesdays is fine, but don't challenge me to come out on a Saturday when it's cold or raining to clean or evangelize or simply encourage another human being out of my comfort zone...sigh...That's simply not okay with me. And so, I have ended the internal debate and have chosen to not be a wimpy Christian. I have decided to let nothing stop me from doing what I feel God says to do. When things happen, I want to be able to rest in the knowledge that they happened under God's watch and not because I wasn't obedient. I can't allow my gender or size or finances or anything else stop me from pursuing after God with a vengeance. I believe that God is looking for more people to step up out of the boat, step out into this big bad world and say, "If I perish, I perish." and then TRUST Him to cover them as they serve on His behalf. 

Hope you'll join me...

Blessings,
MinD

Enjoy The Ride

As I sat on the train to work the other morning, I looked out the window with a sense if peace washing over me. I had been rushing to get to the bus that would lead me to my train --knowing that I had already missed the one that would guarantee an on-time arrival--and had a moment as I settled on the train where I realized that checking the time would be fruitless and only fuel my concerns for timeliness. At this point, I recognized that I was on my way. The matter of when I would arrive was out of my hands. The schedule had been previously determined and when I got on I surrendered my ability to control my timing to the drivers and conductors.

As that reality settled in, I realized that the same thing holds true for the many things I'm waiting on God to make manifest in my life. Sure, I have basic control over when the journey began. I have some part to play in getting things moving. However, when we get on this Faith Train, we must be fully committed to surrendering our control to The Conductor of life, The Lord my God. He's not an imposing God. We are free to get off this train towards destiny at any stop along the way. But getting off the train doesn't negate our need/desire to reach the end destination. Getting off means creating our own delays. When we trust God with our life's schedule, we ensure that we arrive on time.

Checking our watches and constantly asking "when will we get there" doesn't change a thing so we may as well sit back and enjoy the ride.